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Bridges4Kids LogoNY Best Buddies Help Find Special Friendships
They say good friends are hard to find, and as you grow older, you realize that's true.
by John Gray, The Troy Record, 2004
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Imagine, if you will, having a friend who is always happy to see you. Someone who has nothing but kind thoughts and would do anything for you. Now imagine that person is special. By special, I mean someone intellectually disabled. When we were a less polite society, we called these people mentally retarded.


When I was a kid, these special individuals were kept separate from the rest of us. They rode in special school buses and kept to themselves, and for the most part, were invisible. It's not like that anymore. Now they sit right next to your child in school, raise their hands when the teacher asks a question and sit at the same table during lunch. Still, as much as schools try to "mainstream," they are different and, truth be told, they are lonely.

That's where Best Buddies New York comes in. It may be the single greatest program that you and I never heard of.

Best Buddies is a lot like the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program - but with an important difference. They find young adults and match them with a person who is, as they like to say, intellectually disabled - Down syndrome, autism, disabilities of this sort. But not severely disabled. These are people who function extremely well in society but lack one important thing - a friend.

The program was the brainchild of Anthony Kennedy Shriver (son of Eunice, brother of Maria). He was a student at Georgetown University in 1989 when he decided to spend some time with an intellectually challenged student. It went so well he got some friends to do it, and then the good idea spread to other campuses.

Today, there are more than 400 high schools and 300 colleges with a Best Buddies program, including 12 schools in the Capital District alone. Program manager Susanna Adams met me for coffee to talk about Best Buddies, her face lighting up when she talked about these special people who are looking for friendship.


"These individuals are so sweet and giving. All they want from their buddy is friendship. And it's not a big commitment. All we ask is that a volunteer have contact with them once a week. That can be a phone call, e-mail, just sitting and talking. It's not like you have to spend a lot of money or go places to make this person happy."

Susanna says the rest of us take friendship for granted. Just think about sitting at home on a Saturday night wanting to go somewhere but not wanting to sit alone. That's the life of the intellectually disabled every day. She adds, "Just to have someone to sit with them at a football game can mean so much to these individuals. It makes them feel like they belong. Like they are not so different after all."

Susanna can't say enough about the outstanding young people in local schools who have volunteered to be a Best Buddy. There's Pamela at The College of Saint Rose and Lidiya at Guilderland High School, who have set the example for other students. It's funny, she says, once you get one popular kid to sign up, the others follow suit.

For more information on Best Buddies, visit their web site at www.bestbuddiesnewyork.org.

 

Most of us spend our lives chasing money. These individuals seek love. Makes you wonder which of us is the intellectually disabled, doesn't it?

    

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