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Summer Club
Helps Child With Autism Enjoy Friendship
Marla Miller, Muskegon Chronicle, August 07, 2005
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The white, sudsy
foam oozing from a North Muskegon Fire Department
fan-turned-foam-maker covered the grass within minutes, and
before Stacy Burns had the chance to hide prizes, 20 preteen
kids were slipping, sliding and rolling around in it.
Burns called in the fire department to make The Neighborhood
Norsemen's July 28 Water Works Night extra special. It's part of
an effort to create friendships between the students.
She and husband D.J. started the summer friendship club for
North Muskegon's Class of 2011 three years ago to help their
son, Devin Simpson, a 12-year-old with Asperger syndrome, stay
in touch with his classmates and improve his friendship skills.
"We were really concerned how all the other kids were seeing
Devin," she said. "We wanted to make sure there were still
relationships. We wanted them to have an understanding of Devin
and not be scared of him."
Asperger syndrome is a neurological disorder, also classified as
an autism spectrum disorder, that makes social interactions
difficult. Children who have it are often teased and
misunderstood.
"My biggest thing is when parents find his behavior annoying,"
she said. "It doesn't excuse some of the things he does, but it
is part of his disability. Their first assumption is he has
behavioral issues."
Lonely, trying times
Hours before the water works event, as Burns sat at her kitchen
table discussing the family's challenges, a reserved Devin
popped in and out of the room.
"It's fun," he said of the club. "I like Water Works Night."
He sat for a few minutes listening, then asked his mother if he
could play on the computer and later ride his bicycle to the
convenience store for candy. The brown-haired boy with braces
and glasses appeared a polite, ordinary adolescent.
"He's being really good," she said. "You'll see a different
Devin tonight."
A rowdier Devin did surface during the midst of the water works
frenzy. He threw foam at his classmates, ignored instructions,
and afterward, put on the wrong pair of glasses.
While behaviors run the gamut, in general, children with
Asperger syndrome lack the notion of social and emotional
reciprocity. They barge into games, interrupt, talk incessantly
without listening, have one-sided conversations, get upset over
rules and don't like to share.
They tend to be intelligent, labeled "Little Professors," but
are socially naive and have obsessive tendencies. Wires protrude
from Devin's braces -- reflecting his fetish to pick.
Another obsession is reading. He never goes anywhere without a
book, Burns said.
She chairs the Muskegon Area Intermediate School District Parent
Advisory Committee for parents with emotionally and physically
challenged children and understands the importance of advocacy.
"It's difficult when you have a special-needs child," Burns
said. "Sometimes it's kind of lonely. It's equally as lonely for
the family, too. Our phone isn't ringing. He's not invited to a
lot of birthday parties.
"You feel like you have to go the extra mile to help him fit in
a little better. Part of the success has been North Muskegon
schools. They have a lot of talent. I feel so fortunate we moved
here."
When Devin started at North Muskegon in kindergarten, the
Burnses knew he was different. He had been diagnosed with ADHD.
Soon, school officials mentioned Asperger syndrome and they got
a second opinion.
He managed in a regular classroom until fourth grade, when his
disruptions resulted in a string of suspensions. He spent fourth
-- and half of fifth -- grade in the district's North Service
Unit Regional Placement program for emotionally impaired
students. It helped him learn to control his outbursts, but
further isolated him from his peers, Burns said.
He still struggles with some behaviors but has come a long way.
"We work at it all the time," she said. "Now he's mainstreamed.
He made the honor roll all last year."
Friendship and fun
One day, while at his grandparents' house, Devin talked about
wanting to make friends and asked if he could start a club. They
sent invitations to 12 kids in the summer of 2003.
"He was really sad. He had a real desire to have friends," she
said. "I remember my dad said 'If you're going to do it, do it
right.' "
The second year, Burns opened the club to all in Devin's grade
and this year more than 30 students (half his class) signed up
after she sent flyers home at the end of the school year. To
raise interest, the Burnses held a contest to rename the club
and awarded $25 to the child who thought up The Neighborhood
Norsemen.
Past outings have included miniature golf, movies and roller
skating. Burns also has organized scavenger hunts, Fear
Factor-type games and craft activities, and tries to patronize
North Muskegon businesses.
"We really have a nice bunch of kids," Burns said. "A lot of
them we didn't know before friendship club. Some of the girls
have become really strong advocates when he's getting teased or
bullied at school."
About 20 kids turned out for Water Works Night, running around
in the shady lot in front of North Muskegon schools until nearly
sunset. The entire group of soon-to-be seventh-graders laughed
and smiled. Their laughter and chatter continued for two hours
as they played in plastic swimming pools, tossed eggs and
whirled water balloons.
They danced around as a firefighter drenched them with the hose
and cheered on team members during a water balloon busting relay
race. They ended the evening with a free-for-all water balloon
fight.
No cliques. No teasing. Just kids having fun.
"In the summer, it's hard to get together with your friends,"
said Jessica Carlson, who has participated all three summers.
"It's gotten a lot bigger than it used to be."
Erin Alderink wasn't busy with dance this summer and decided to
check out the club. She enjoyed watching "Fantastic Four" with
the group July 14 and returned for Water Works Night.
"It's just a good way to keep in touch with my friends and
there's a lot of fun stuff we get to do," she said.
Lauren Budd echoed those sentiments. Her mother, Tami, observed
the action and noted they were making memories that likely would
be relived at graduation and class reunions. She also gave the
Burnses credit for taking on such a time-consuming commitment.
"It's a great way of integrating the kids who may not hang
together," said Tami Budd. "They can all have fun even if
they're not with their best friends."
The club, while not the answer for all special-needs children,
has been a blessing for the Burns family. It has allowed Devin
to act like a normal kid and opened the door for the Burnses to
explain his syndrome.
"This has been a good way for us to mingle with people," she
said. "You really have to make an effort to throw yourself out
there and get involved in the community. It makes life so much
easier when you can talk about his disability."
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